things i like: Archive

someone who thinks i'm Helen keeps texting/calling me and leaving aggressive voicemails

6:44 pm oct. 16
HELEN WHERE IS MY WHITE CAR!

[sent 7 pm oct. 16: i think you have the wrong number, im not helen. sorry]

8:09 pm oct. 18
HELEN WHY DID YOU TAKE SOME OF MY 60MG MORPHINE & SOME OF MY ADDERALLS,YOU KNOW THAT I NEED MY ADDERALLS?DID YOU HONESTLY THINK THAT I WOULDN’T

8:10 pm oct.18
FIND OUT ABOUT IT,& YOU WONDER WHY I LOCK MY DOOR EVEN WHEN THERE IS NO ONE HERE BUT YOU & ME,FOR THE SIMPLE FACT THAT I KNOW HOW YOU ARE HELEN THATS WHY

8:10 pm oct. 18
,I DO NOT TRUST YOU AT ALL!!! I’M GLAD YOU AT LEAST YOU SPENT SOME OF THE MONEY ON THE BOYS!/^^^^^^^THATS THE TEXT I SENT YOU EARLIER HELEN

that is all i have so far. i’ll keep you posted

OH MAN. this is excellent. eagerly awaiting updates.

Oct 19, 20095 notes

All the balloon boy nonsense has led me to this excellent wikipedia article.

choice quotes:

“He took his pellet gun, a CB radio, sandwiches, cold beer, and a camera.”

“When asked by a reporter why he had done it, Walters replied, ‘A man can’t just sit around.’”

Oct 16, 2009

do you guys read “emails from crazy people”? you should. you should also avoid fart parties.

WAIT A MOMENT!!!!!! I never gave you permission to share these emails or any other information with ANY of your “departments”, i know what your doing! Your passing these emails around like a drunk girl at a fart party and giggling at my misfortune. Once again you guys have proven you don’t care about the every day people who you rip off to keep your company afloat.

Oct 16, 2009

i am hunting a mosquito who is hunting oscar who is hunting the mosquito

Oct 14, 20091 note

Oct 13, 20096 notes

Oct 13, 200951 notes

mystery solved.

i pulled my sheets out of the dryer and when i stuck my nose in and inhaled deeply i thought “mmmm these sheets smell like chris” and then i remembered that he does his laundry at my apartment.

Oct 7, 2009

wait i forget

do you guys like twilight? or is that just me and my tragically not-internet-obsessed texas friend.

Oct 7, 2009

Oct 7, 200964 notes

Play

Oct 7, 2009

“god i don’t ever want to be able to discern someone’s buttcrack in overcast light from 15 feet away ever again. i feel very strongly about this.” —anna

Oct 6, 2009

having a job is cool but it seems to have sucked away some of my enthusiasm for the internet

i’ve had 1000+ unread items in google reader for like 3 weeks now. the only time that happened to me before was when i went to jekyll island for a week and didn’t have internet. and i haven’t tumbled in a while. and i just caught up on like 20 posts from the up down mix stairs. dear internet, i kind of miss you.

Oct 3, 20091 note

things i like

October 2009

15 posts